At last

I can unload.

The last couple of months have been awful.  It's not an exaggeration.  It's the honest truth.

I said I had my girlfriend living with us.  I offered her the chance to stay with us while she looked for a job and a place to live. I mean there were better prospects here than in Edgecumbe.  As she was on a sickness benefit she paid a low board (even lower than what she paid her mother)  and to help with the dinner, housework and gardens etc.

Well it didn't quite work like that.  In fact she got so damn use to sitting home all day,  in the warmth, on my laptop that she didn't even bother to look for work.   She cooked occasionally and when she did she'd phone me at work for things she needed????  When I left for work in the morning - she was on laptop playing games.  When I came home from work - she was on my laptop playing games.  Dishes and glasses on the bench that had been there all day - what the hell, we have a dishwasher.  Housework was a once a week vacumn and to wash the towels.  It was like she was living in a hotel.

She was addicted to playing games and as soon as either me or Mr T went off our laptops she pounced straight on, even if we were only doing a loo stop.  

She sat right across the table from me and felt like she was watching me the whole time just waiting for me to get off.  It was awful.  It was a huge invasion of our privacy.  

Then she started giving Mr T instructions, talking to him like she was the boss etc, He couldn't stay in the same room as her.  Tension was great - but she couldn't sense it.

I couldn't get my frustration out because even though she is not computer savvy she could stumble onto my blog by accident as I have it bookmarked.  

I didn't want her to read how I felt on my blog.

But I wasn't afraid to tell her.  

Which I did - two weeks ago.

I let her know exactly how we felt, that she was no closer to finding a job than when she arrived.  She had done nothing to find one.  She needed to get off her butt and go hand her CV out

I felt used and taken for granted.  I did say a lot of others things and I was strong and didn't back down.

I gave her two weeks - then she would have to go back to her mothers.  I had to put my family first.

It took TWO days - and she had a job.  Okay only part-time but still.  

I went on Trade Me and found a nice one bedroomed, fully furnished unit for $190 a week, only a short walk from town.  She had absolutely nothing having sold off everything to go Aussie last November.  She had to borrow money to even get home.  Fully furnished meant there was no mucking trying to save and buy furniture to get her started.  She could move straight away.

I negotiated with the Real Estate Agent right up to the time that her application had been processed etc then I gave them her phone no to sort out viewing times.  She got it, WINZ paid for her bond to move, and on Saturday we moved her in.  Woo freaking Who.

Her sister brought her some bedding, her bike and old laptop over for her last weekend.  

I gave her crockery, cutlery, pots and pans, utensils, a heater and a small tv.  

I did a shop on Saturday and got her the bare basics to set up.  Like what you would get when the kids go flatting.  She had nothing, not even shampoo etc.  So I got all that, washing powder, soap, shampoo, cleaner, and the basic staples, tins of food, milk eggs, cheese, bread, butter, a few small bags of fresh veges and a couple of meat choices.  She has enough food for a week.  

So she's got a good start.  I feel I've done enough, in fact I feel like I have done more than enough, but I don't like to see anyone suffer and it was worth it to make sure she was going to be okay.

I have too, been given the "stop rescuing" people lecture from two different people, neither of them my husband who has supported me and had every reason to kick her out a while ago.  

I have learnt my lesson.  Honest.  

Yesterday was our first whole day at home again and it was BLISS.  I can't even begin to tell you how good it was.

It is nice to have my home back.  I am too set in my ways to have another women in my house for an extended period of time.

 Anyway, here's moving day.  As you can see it's quite a nice little flat with everything she needs.

Even a nice little deck and fenced in backyard, which will be lovely in summer. 

 

I feel really good now.  It's nice to go home.

Catch you soon.

Ciao